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Don't Mess With Me

Title: Don't Mess With Me
Pairing: Gen
Word Count: 307
Disclaimer: If I owned the Hobbit, Dís would have a theme song
Summary: No really, this is Dís' theme song.  To the tune of Don't Mess With Me.

Every bard will sing
Of Thorin's majesty
Like he's some mighty king
Who could have done it without me

No, my brother is a fool
Without two wits to make a plan
His mind obsessed with jewels
Just like every other man

Truly his stupidity can hardly be believed
He and my two sons are gonna be the death of me

See my crown, I am a queen
Bow to my overwhelming majesty
For I am fierce, a Durin born
And I will see you go extinct

So don't mess with me
You'll lose your head
Don't mess with me

I could have killed that dragon
Helped my brother with his task
But instead he just went running off
And now I'm sharpening my axe
Because my sons went with him
Their fool heads filled with fluff
So no one better kill them before I reach Erebor

Touch my family and you'll eat steel
Because I am what danger learns to fear

See my crown, I am a queen
Bow to my overwhelming majesty
For I am fierce, a Durin born
And I will see you go extinct

So don't mess with me
I'll see you dead
Don't mess with me

'Cause all your heads are gonna roll
If you dare to block my goal
So if you want survival
Kneel on my arrival
You'll kiss the ground before I'm done

No one can stop me
And if you try I'll take you out
Because I am that awesome
Badass without a doubt

See my crown, I am a queen
Bow to my overwhelming majesty
For I am fierce, a Durin born
And I will see you go extinct

So don't mess with me
You'll lose your head
Don't mess with mine
I'll see you dead
Don't mess with Dís
I'm Azog's dread
Don't mess with me


Finis