Warnings: Explicit sex, failed assassination attempts, crack
Word Count: 3516
Disclaimer: If I owned it, it would be way less angsty.
Summary: In which God is an interfering bastard and David Shepherd just won't die.
David Shepherd simply would not die and it was starting to vex Jack terribly. Really killing him should have been easy – a simple farm boy all alone in the big city should have been a lamb to slaughter – but all of his attempts to remove the competition kept getting foiled unexpectedly.
It was God; Jack knew it was God because the Lord did not even pretend at subtlety.
Instead He worked miracles like they were going out of style and the prince was getting seriously fed up with it. Because every assassin that he hired somehow ended up joining a monastery before the job was completed, the arsenic he put in his rival's orange juice just made the idiot shine brighter and the wind came up right when Jack was trying to drop a gargoyle on Shepherd's head.
Admittedly, that last plan wasn't one of the prince's better efforts, but in his defense, he had been quite drunk at the time. In fact, he had been busy cursing God’s interference over a bottle of tequila when he had gotten the idea and a lesser man would have given up after a fail like that.
But not Jack; the epic hangover that he woke up with the next morning just made him more determined to see his rival fall. Sure the prince had already tried a dozen different methods and the Lord would probably swat down the next dozen tries as well, but he was the rightful heir to the throne of Gilboa and he would be damned before he let some farm boy steal his crown. Particularly a farm boy who didn't seem to realize that Jack was trying to kill him, Shepherd tagging after the prince like some kind of pathetic puppy dog.
If the man were seven it might have been adorable, but Jack was getting tired of his rival following him around. After all, it was a little hard to plan David’s murder with him standing right there, the prince feeling a twinge of guilt when he looked in the other's guileless blue eyes.
No one should be that innocent and Jack was half convinced that David was just a fantastic actor, but even if that were true, God was still watching over him. So the prince switched his schemes from assassination to reckless endangerment, hoping that sheer dumb luck might serve him where sneakiness had failed.
He took David shooting, riding and river rafting, aiming the other man at every rock, tree and ravine that he could see. He threw the blond on a motorcycle without any prior training and watched in horror as Gilboa's traffic parted like the sea. Because there was a guardian angel sitting on Shepherd's shoulder, one who turned his rival’s wonderfully skittish horse into a pillar of calm out on the trail and ensured that David's parachute still held him despite the gaping holes in the fabric on their skydiving trip. Even the prince’s “accidental discharge” on the gun range missed the other man by a mile when Jack had been able to shoot coins out of the sky for years.
And through it all Shepherd never seemed to notice the other man's frustration, his glares, or the sheer bloody-minded fury that he barely held in check. Not that his rival was the only one who remained oblivious because no matter how obvious his scheming – and the fact that he willingly jumped out of an airplane should have made it rather clear – no one acknowledged Jack's sudden urge toward homicide.
Instead Michelle just kept chasing her pet causes and throwing flirty looks at David when she thought they were alone. His mother continued planning the next big spectacle to keep the public's mind off the way the war was going and his father treated Shepherd like his new favored son.
The latter pissed Jack off the most since in a just world Silas would be helping him take out the interloper before their family lost the crown. But no, the king seemed ready to name David as his heir any day now, and after that whole mess at the treaty signing, Jack decided that it was time for drastic measures after all. While he had avoided outright murder before, doing this himself was obviously the only option and the prince was pretty sure that he could live with David's blood on his hands.
Mostly pretty sure and he was hardly going to turn back because of a twinge of conscience now. So he slipped Thomasina's ever watchful eyes to steal a gun from the royal armory, only to get cornered by Reverend Samuels in the hall.
“You must stop this. David has been chosen and if you continued to walk this path, I will be forced to strike you down,” the Reverend intoned, the crazy echoes in his voice making it clear just whom Jack was talking to.
But God or no, “I take orders from no one, you hear me. You may have my father and Shepherd and this entire kingdom dancing to your tune, but I'm not letting my crown go without a fight. Because I only take orders when I'm in bed and I ain't fucking you.”
“Is that so?” the Reverend smiled creepily before suddenly disappearing, the prince left staring at an empty corridor like an idiot.
Jack hadn't actually meant to say that last part but he had an unfortunate habit of blurting things out when he was angry and surely that smile didn't mean anything. But as the prince soon discovered, the Lord had a truly awful sense of humor and a sadistic streak when you messed with His plans.
Suddenly he couldn't turn around without bumping into Shepherd, even places where the man had no right to be. But whether he was walking in on showers, clothes fittings, or unfortunate incidents with soup and tripping waiters, Jack soon found himself with a surfeit of shirtlessness on his hands. Really, God wasn't playing fair because as much as the prince hated David, he had never claimed that the man was unattractive and he'd been too busy with his assassination plans to get laid in far too long.
But as ever, Jack's pride was stronger than his desire and there was no way that he was breaking first. Not even if his rival looked far too enticing soaked to the skin in summer sunshine and he had gained an annoying habit of dropping things on the floor whenever the prince was in the room.
Jack wasn't going to break but he had to give God points for effort when the incidents started occurring the other way around as well. Honestly, after the tenth shirt he lost to David's “accidental rippage,” the prince started wondering if his rival was doing it on purpose and really, the man should have learned where his own bathroom was by now. Though it was probably just God again since neither of them had ever been clumsy people and yet they were suddenly tripping and falling on each other at least twice a day.
Which is how the prince discovered that his rival's ass felt just as fantastic as it looked and Shepherd might not be as straight as he had seemed. Because Jack wasn't the only one copping a feel whenever the Lord threw them down together and he hadn't known that David could smirk like that.
But he was still a stubborn bastard so it wasn't until his rival walked in on him masturbating that he finally gave up the fight.
Jack had just been getting to the good part, hand slick around his cock as he sprawled out on the bed and he only noticed the interruption when someone shouted, “Oh my God!” To be honest, the prince thought about continuing anyway since it's not like he'd never had an audience, but he just couldn't do it when he opened his eyes to see David staring down at him in shock.
“I could have sworn this was the library,” the other man muttered, his face flaming with embarrassment even as he didn't look away. Actually, Shepherd looked rather fascinated and Jack had never had anyone look quite so awestruck by his cock before.
However, as flattering as it was, the prince was kind of in the middle of something here and he'd like to finish it. Only David showed no signs of moving and in a sudden burst of insight, Jack could see exactly how the rest of his life would play out. Inconvenient interruptions, bruises from tumbling down the stairs together, and the bluest balls that he had ever had.
Because at this rate the prince would never get to come again until he did what the Lord wanted and it's not like it would be any great hardship to take the blond to bed when he had a mouth like that.
“All right. You win you fucking pimp,” Jack muttered at the ceiling before looking up at David with his best sultry smirk. “So, are you going to help me with this or would you prefer to keep standing there like an idiot?”
While the words were not exactly a romantic declaration, the prince had never been one to give in gracefully and the explicit hand gestures got his point across. Indeed David's rather adorable confusion was quickly replaced with eagerness when Jack spread his legs in invitation and he practically fell over himself to join the other man.
Sure he was a little clumsy, but the prince could not fault the blond's enthusiasm when he slammed their lips together and he rather liked the idea of corrupting God's chosen one. But while this might be a negotiation, it was not a surrender so Jack released David's mouth long enough to say.
“I'm still not giving up my throne to you or anyone. But if you impress me, I might be convinced to share.”
“I live to serve my kingdom,” the other man replied with a crooked smile and the prince knew that he would never be able to hear those words again without getting hard. Not when David's hands were warm and strong around him and his rival seemed determined to keep his promises.
Because the blond dove in without hesitation, leaning down to kiss Jack like he'd been starving for it and all the prince could do was let him in. So he pushed up into the kiss, thrusting his tongue into David's mouth even as he thrust into his hand. The taste was addicting, fresh and sweet and intoxicating, and Jack was pretty sure that he was fucked. Fucked and getting fucked if the way that the other man was grinding against his leg was any indication and the prince had to let out a moan at the thought.
Because it had been far too long since someone rode him properly, too long since he'd felt this kind of passion, and he was never going to let David go after this. So his sister would just have to live with the disappointment and Jack would feel guilty when the blond wasn't stroking him masterfully.
Well, to be honest, he'd probably skip feeling guilty entirely since there was no way that David was straight with skills like that. His rival seemed to know exactly how to make Jack come apart beneath him, jerking his cock hard and fast as he bit at the prince's lips. Shepherd liked to use his teeth, the man leaving a trail of hickeys down Jack's neck like some kind of brand. But while the prince used to kick his lovers out for marking him like that, it seemed kind of pointless to worry about hiding anymore.
Why should he worry when it was apparently his God-given right to fuck his rival stupid and he fully intended to enjoy having the Lord on his side for once? So Jack pulled David's head back to leave a hickey of his own, sucking a red mark into the blond's shoulder as a giant “Do Not Cross.”
Then he wrapped a leg around David's hips and rolled them over, reaching down to grab a handful of that ridiculously perfect ass. The prince obviously should have started fucking farm boys sooner if they were all built like this and at some point he was going to tie his rival to the bed so and explore to his heart's content. But if Jack didn't get David's cock in him right the fuck now he was going to go crazy so he pulled himself away from the other's mouth with a groan.
“Jack. What are you doing? Come back here and let me suck you,” David pleaded, pressing kisses to every part of the prince that he could reach.
However, Jack just swatted his hands away and grabbed for the bedside table, jerking the whole drawer out when the blond sank his teeth into his lover's ass. The sharp burst of pain made his cock jump against David's hip and Jack dumped the contents of the drawer on the floor with a curse when the blond gave him a matching bite on the other side. But a bit of frantic fumbling eventually yielded the prize that he was looking for and he turned back to David with a triumphant smirk.
“All right, farm boy. Show me what you can do,” the prince ordered as he tossed the bottle over. “Unless, of course, you need instructions on where to stick your cock because, in that case, I'd be happy to oblige.”
“Oh, come on, Jack. Not you too. I don't know why everyone always assumes that I'm some kind of virgin,” David grumbled, pressing Jack's face to the pillows before slicking up his hand. “As you're so fond of reminding me, I grew up on a farm not in a monastery. So shut it, you royal bastard, and take your fucking like a man.”
Jack couldn't help but laugh at hearing God's chosen swear like that, his head jerking up in surprise as the sound left his mouth. He couldn't remember the last time that he'd actually laughed when in bed with someone, or at all in recent months, and he almost called the whole thing off right then. However, it was hard to freak out when David was looking down at him so fondly and his eyes fluttered shut with pleasure as a rough finger finally pressed into him.
He had known that the blond's hands were large but they felt even bigger pushing deep inside his body, David's thrusts gentle but relentless as he stretched Jack open for his cock. The prince was so on edge now after months of abstinence and weeks of sexual tension that he could easily have come from this alone. But there was no way that he was letting go before he got that gorgeous dick inside him so Jack twisted his hands into the sheets and held on while David finger-fucked him slow. His rival was almost cruel about it, working the prince open without ever once touching his prostate and he was ready to curse the man into oblivion by the time he pulled his fingers out.
However, his annoyance was quickly replaced with anticipation when he heard the crackle of a condom wrapper and the blunt head of David's cock pressed against his hole. Though, of course, the idiot farm boy couldn't just get on with it, stroking the tip of his dick along the crack of Jack's ass and teasing across his entrance until the prince was ready to scream again.
“Just do it already, you fucktard,” Jack groaned when David just kept waiting and apparently that was the permission that the blond was waiting for. Because his rival thrust forward seconds later, slamming into the prince hard enough to knock all the air from his body as he was filled to the brink.
David didn't give him any time to adjust before pulling out again and it was entirely unfair that his cock felt just as good as Jack had imagined in his fantasies. If anything it was better since the blond seemed determined to fuck him into the mattress and the prince certainly wasn't complaining about the pace he set. It was hard and fast and perfect, David's balls slapping against his ass with every thrust, and it was all he could do to keep from slamming his face into the bed.
But he was the fucking crown prince of Gilboa so he braced his arms against the headboard and shoved himself backward, meeting every stroke as best he could. Honestly, it wasn't going to take long for him to come from this, Jack biting back a scream when David wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled his ass higher off the bed.
With the change in angle, the blond's cock was dragging across his prostate with every thrust; the sharp spikes of pleasure more then he could stand. So a few strokes later, Jack finally lost it, screaming his rival's name into his pillow as his mind shorted out.
When his brain came back online, David was still fucking him and he was almost insulted to discover that the blond hadn't even slowed his pace. Of course, almost didn't count for much since the prince was mostly just turned on, his dick giving a valiant twitch at the feel of his rival's cock sliding into him. But Jack wasn't sixteen anymore and no amount of rubbing against the sheets would be enough to get him hard again just yet.
So he twisted around to grab onto David's shoulder, pulling the blond into another heated kiss instead. He mapped out his rival's mouth to the rhythm of his fucking and when Jack felt the other man start to tremble, he clenched around his cock as tightly as he could.
Which was pretty damn tight since the prince had always been a perfectionist in everything and he felt a rush of satisfaction when David finally came apart inside of him. The blond groaned into Jack's mouth like he was dying, hips jerking against the prince's ass uncontrollably, and he was definitely ruined after this. Because all Jack wanted to do was fuck him again, drag David down into sin and perversion and show him just how deep the rabbit hole would go.
Maybe next time the prince would see if his rival was up for bottoming, lay his own claim on that firm ass of his and see if he could get David begging before he was done. Which he would if Jack had anything to say about because Jack always got what he wanted in the end.
Hell, he got David, didn't he? The blond had been wrapped up for him by God himself and the prince wasn't going to look that gift horse in the mouth. Sure this hadn't been the original plan, but it was definitely growing on him and Jack had been getting tired of all those failed assassinations anyway. Continual failure was just embarrassing and this path had some definite perks tied up in it.
Honestly, the prince couldn't wait to see his father's face when Silas realized that his faggot son had corrupted his precious hero and this would certainly put Jack one up on his sister in their ongoing game. Of course, if he were really being honest, he would have to admit that the biggest perk was the idiot currently drooling on his ear.
Because somewhere beneath the snark and the dislike and the sheer unadulterated jealousy, Jack had fallen half in love with David Shepherd, idiocy and all.
Speak of the devil, that same idiot appeared to have recovered his senses and they both groaned when he pulled out. Although, as it turned out, farm boy was also a gentleman since he came back with a damp cloth to clean the prince's stomach, wiping him off gently before getting back in bed.
“So did I pass?” David asked, resting his chin on Jack's shoulder as he wrapped his arms around the prince. It was nauseatingly domestic, the two of them cuddling together like they were in some kind of actual relationship, and if the prince hadn't been so fucked out, he would have shoved his former rival off the bed on principle.
But as it was, Jack was much too comfortable to worry about moving so he just pressed back into David's chest and gave a one-armed shrug. “I don't know, farm boy. I think I might need another go round to decide. Wake me up in an hour and you can try again.”
“Demanding, aren't you?” David murmured, though he sounded more amused than offended by Jack's response. Indeed, the last thing that the prince felt as he dozed off was the sensation of warm lips against his neck and a whispered, “As you wish.”